Don't worry, you didn't miss my birthday or any spectacular birthday party in my honor. But today it has been confirmed that I AM OLD. I can't deny it any longer, no use fighting it. It's time to accept what is and what is not.
Here is my reasoning for this assumption:
1. On my way to work I turned the radio UP to listen to what the people were saying, and DOWN when the music came on.
DANG, I hated it when my mom did that, and never could understand her logic. You can't jam out to commercials and radio talk, you turn it up to jam to the MUSIC.
2. I got a catalog for Pier 1 and actually was excited to look at it.
What? Pier 1, Pottery Barn,. Who am I? When did this happen? Ugh, I used to despise Pier 1 and the countless hours that were consumed while in one. Come on Mom...are we done yet???
3. Once a week I let Jayda go to the convenience store in Bison on our way home and get a treat. And...here's the kicker..I don't get ANYTHING?
I remember begging to go to "the store" after school and get a pop and a candy bar. Those were the days. Carmelo's or Reese's or Butterfingers's were my top choices. Or snickers or starburst or skittles, or..OK you get the point.
4. I heard myself say things like "When I was in high school," or "When I was a kid, we didn't...." Or "We didn't have digital cameras, or {gasp} cell phones!"
I was in college when I got my first cell phone. How did I function? How did I know where to go after school or who was going to pick me up? Oh, that's right. WE TALKED in person, made plans AHEAD of time. Huh....strange.
5. I use phrases like, "Not until after supper," "Do you want a spank'in?" Words like jammies, yummy, yucky, No-No.
{Sigh} See what motherhood does to a person. Turns you into a total sap. Do you want a spank'in? Really?...who came up with that question.
6. I forget things more often than I should.
I was reaching for something in the kitchen a few days ago, and actually forgot what I was reaching for, mid-reach. What the? Who does that. My hand got to the utensil can and my mind went...huh? what? what are you doing digging in the utensil can? I had to sit down and think about it for a minute.. . . .tick tock tick tock. OHHH yeah, I was cooking...hello spoon. Nice to meet you.
7. I take coffee breaks at work, but don't drink coffee.
My daily grind revolves around 8am get to work, 10am coffee, 12pm lunch, 3pm coffee, 4:30pm go home. Interupt this cycle and we've got a bad day on our hands. Look out. I mean it...LOOK OUT.
8. I'm slightly more irritable than I remember being.
Or could it possibly be that people are just more annoying? Yeah...that has to be it. Wait, what was I talking about? ha See #6 above.
9. I take naps, and I like it. I go to bed at 9pm. Sometimes 10 if I'm feeling really crazy.
If Jed asks if I want to rent a movie, I look at the clock and say, "What? Are you crazy. it's already 8 o'clock. It wouldn't get over until {gasp} 10pm! Good thing for video on demand and not having to wait for pay per view's scheduling. Ugh
10. I watch the news.
Not only do I watch it, I look forward to it. I also read the paper, I read lots of papers. Rapid, Bison, Faith, Lemmon. Why do I have to know so much? Why?
However I DO NOT watch FOX NEWS or MSNBC, or whatever all those Anderson Cooper, Bill O'Reilly, Nancy Grace people are on. Don't worry about how I know their names. That's beside the point. Stick with me here.
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